We recently had the privilege of re-enacting the experience
of Jens and Elsie Nielson on Rocky Ridge.
We studied to learn all we could of their lives and knew they were
strong and stalwart members, sacrificing the money saved from the sale of their
farm in
Denmark to share
with others who did not have the means to travel to
Zion, but with their help could now go by
handcart.
Their plans to purchase a
wagon were abandoned as they would also travel by handcart. After the first winter storms hit the Willie and Martin handcart companies crossing present day Wyoming in mid-October 1856, we knew Jens had
done all in his power to push and pull his handcart for weeks through deep snow
until finally his feet were so frozen he could go no further.
We knew they along with all their company were starving, but we also knew Elsie was willing to do whatever was
necessary to save the life of her sweetheart. Although less than five feet
tall, she truly did save his life as she pulled him in their handcart for about
a week until a wagon was available for him to ride in.
We didn’t really have a concept of how difficult this was
for Jens and Elsie. We learned, in some
small way, that day on Rocky Ridge. As we pulled the handcart together, Jens eventually collapsed and I
helped him into the handcart. I tried to imagine Elsie doing this,
placing blankets or clothing under and around him to help protect him from the
jarring and discomfort in this box of rescue.
We learned immediately how challenging this must have been to fit a
grown man in such a small space without great discomfort for Jens.
As I began to pull the handcart alone, a steep incline was
immediately in my face. No matter which
way I turned the cart I could not get the wheels over this incline. What later, as we descended, looked like a tiny
hill seemed now so out my ability to ascend.
I knew Elsie had obstacles like this to get through and I was determined
I could and would do the same.
I tried to find something on the trail I could grab hold of
to help me get better leverage; some rock in the dirt or brush close by.
I put the bar of the handcart across my
stomach and reached ahead on the trail into the dirt for anything I could grab
that would help me pull a few inches up over the hill.
There was nothing but sand and dirt and loose
rocks at that point.
I pictured Elsie
pulling up this hill in the snow and wondered if she could have gotten a grip
on snow that would help her.
I wondered
how she could have pulled the wheels through deep snow and ice in a driving blizzard.
It very soon became apparent to me I could
not do this alone.
I wondered if Jens had
been able to help Elsie at such times and as Jens/Elder Brunner pushed with all his might on
the spokes of the wheel from his cramped and awkward position in the bed of the
cart, we were finally able to get over that first little hill.
By now I was panting for breath and exhausted,
but determined to do this on my own as Elsie must have done.
"Angels" had been designated to come to our aid when we signaled them, and they were close at hand, asking repeatedly
if they could help me.
I kept answering “no,
not yet, I can do this”.
I don’t know
how long I tried to do it alone, nor how far I made it without our angel
helpers.
I prayed for help almost from
the first moments I began to pull.
I
kept pleading “Heavenly Father, please help me, please help me do this”.
Then as our angels would call out that they
were there, I would answer over and over, “no, not yet, I can do this”.
Part of me wanted to do this for Elsie, as
she would have done it; part as I wanted to do it.
I'd had an opportunity to be involved in two "women's pulls" at Martin's Cove and
Willie Sixth Crossing where the men drop out and women pull the handcart alone, simulating what it would have been like when the husbands and fathers died or were disabled and the women had to pull their carts alone. I had been somewhat disappointed at the conclusion of the
woman’s pull.
It hadn’t been challenging
enough.
I wanted to know what it really
was like for the women to pull their handcarts alone and I felt it must have
been much harder than the experience of an empty cart with 5 to 8 women pulling
and pushing.
Now I was getting a full dose of realization, and I simply
could not do it alone up the steep Rocky Ridge ascent.
I knew at some point our angels (Sister
Simper and Sister Haacke) had begun pushing the handcart.
I could feel, as we hear in the pioneer
journals, that the handcart began pushing me.
I didn’t look back, but I knew they were there.
I had been told that when I had done all I
could I was to give the angels a signal to begin helping.
I never gave them that signal, but the angels
knew when enough was enough and they made the decision themselves that they
would help us.
Even with their help the
ascent up Rocky Ridge was very difficult.
I’d asked our Elder angels (Elder Haacke and Elder Simper) to let the
women try to do it alone as long as we could.
They honored this request and just as they knew more help was needed,
Sister Sanders came running down the ridge to help pull the cart over. I didn’t hear her, but was told that she
asked the men to let the women do it alone for now. Finally, there was no way to make it without
the help of our men angels as well. There
were now six of us on the handcart, and still this was not enough. Other men and women joined in and helped over
the last rocks and steep incline of Rocky Ridge.
What did we learn from this experience….More than we can
describe and share here.
It’s been more
difficult than I could have known to put into words this spiritual experience,
but I will try to elaborate a few things:
·
I know that Elsie and Jens could not have
endured this challenge without heavenly help.
It is too hard, too physically taxing, too emotionally draining to know
the life of a loved one is in your hands and you cannot do what needs to be
done to save their life. Elsie could not
have done what she did without help.
·
None of the handcart pioneers could have done
what they did without heavenly help.
When they had given all they had and there was no more to draw upon, I
know angels were there to help them.
·
I believe that heavenly help was there sooner
than later. They had been starving for weeks. They were freezing and pulling in below zero temperatures with gale force winds. It is too physically
impossible to have done what they did without that help.
·
When I was pleading for Heavenly Father to help
me, He was. He had sent angels to
help. I was telling them no, not
yet. I wonder how often I do this in my
personal life now, turning aside heavenly help that is ready and willing,
because of my own pride or determination to do it alone. And I know heavenly help is often sent to our aide in the form of Heavenly Father's other children. How many times does help come to us from earthly angels in answer to our prayers?
·
I am convinced we each have angels to help
us. They know us and love us and have
part in the everyday accomplishments of life and are there assisting us, even at
times when we have not asked for that help.
·
When I look at photos now and see all the hands
that were there helping to pull that one handcart up Rocky Ridge, I know beyond
a shadow of doubt that there was much help for all of our handcart pioneers to
accomplish what they did, as well as with the amazing rescuers who accomplished
the seemingly impossible to bring them to safety.
·
Sacrificing for those we love draws us closer to
them. And being on the receiving end of
that sacrifice by others is perhaps even more powerful.
·
I am overwhelmed by the faith and determination
of our handcart pioneers. They had, as
Wallace Stegner stated “none of the skills that make frontiersmen. But they had some of the stuff that makes
heroes”. They are my heroes in a very
real and personal way.
·
This was a life-changing experience for us. We know we will never look at our handcart
pioneers in the same way, and we will never doubt heavens help that was there
for them and is there for us.
Thoughts from Jens:
From Jens’ perspective, I had a real struggle watching my
wife working so hard with so little result.
I was concerned about how I could help.
I decided to push on the spoke at the top near the wheel, and help turn
the wheel a little. My wife felt this
help, and asked me to time it with her pull.
She would count to three, and we would both give it all we had. After a few tries, the handcart jumped over
the small bump, and working together we were able to make some progress. It was so hard for me to remain in the
handcart and watch my sweet wife struggle so much. I wanted so much to get out and help her
instead of being a burden.